User Profile

Hello ladies and gentlemen! My anme is Jenny, but you can call me Aphranay! I am a reeeeeaaaaaallllly SLOW typer!!! As well as that I live in the land of cheese in a slum! I have two pet lizards, Minstral and Spud. I adore them, but they hate me! Every time they see my ugly face looming over them in their cage they think 'Oh no, not that owner-girl again!! My favourite things in the world are Ellie, French lessons, sex, and J-rock!! My hobbies are lap-dancing, pole-dancing, daisy-chaining and happy-slapping. I live in Cheddar. It is the most amazing place to be, they make lots of cheese there. And Cider. I LOOOOOOOVE TEH CIDER MAYN!!!! The nightlife here is amazing too, and there are more fat tourists with cameras around their necks wearing 'Kiss me quick, squeeze me slowly' t-shirts and marvelling at the pile of rocks that is Cheddar gorge than you can shake a big stick at. In Cheddar there is a school called Kings and that is where I go. The dictator headteacher is called Billy and he is a one!!

I have boyfriend called Mr Badchild! He is so bad! Almost too bad to function! He runs a tattoo parlour in Bristol, it is called 'The Bad Shack' He also teaches geography at my school, but he has a fake identity there, as Mr Goodchild. He covers up his badness sooo well with his little fleece jackets and his ho ho ho laugh!!!

You may have noticed that I said one of my favourite things is Ellie. Well, Ellie is my friend and role-model in life. I really look up to her, and I always take down notes when she is speaking so that I can read them and pick up tips on how to be as amazing as her! She really is something, she must be like the best person in the world, especially when it comes to examining j-rockers crotches.

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